HW # 2 - Food - Initial Thoughts

When I think of food off the top of my head, I think of Joey Chestnut and Nathan's Annual Hot Dog Eating Contest on Coney Island. When I was younger, I was fascinated by the idea that someone could actually eat fifty something hot dogs AND the rolls. I mean I could imagine scarfing down the dogs, but, come on, with the doughy rolls too? Not possible. Now I understand that the contenders prepare for days by expanding their stomachs with lettuce or something and then they throw everything up afterwards, so it is all less romantic.

After this summer's contest my brother, a serious athlete who can eat a lot, told me that we could have our own contest. He produced a box of Saltine crackers and bet me a dollar that I could not eat four of them without drinking water. I said, "Would you like to raise that bet to $5?" I was so sure that I could eat about a whole box of crackers without a drink if I had the right incentive. My brother tried first and he could not swallow all four crackers. I was shocked. I thought, "Easy peasy winning this bet." I ate two crackers. Then I tried to swallow two more, but the first two had soaked up every ounce of moisture in my mouth and I just gagged. I couldn't get them down. I lost the bet. I blame my saliva glands, which just did not perform.


Another great food time with my brother took place in a Chinese restaurant. We were with his friend Bryan and a few other of his friends. Bryan is badly allergic to shellfish. He said he barely made it to the emergency room the last time he tried
a crabcake. When the waiter came, he asked if the spring rolls had any shellfish in them. The waiter said they didn't, but my brother said, "Are you sure? This guy could die with just one shrimp leg." The waiter brought the food, and when Bryan bit into his spring roll, he could see a whole shrimp inside. He put it on the side of the plate, and we all tried to get the waiter's attention. When he came, Bryan told him what happened, and the waiter asked to see the shrimp. Bryan couldn't find it, and the reason he couldn't was because my brother ate it. He is so greedy for food that he just reached for it while everyone was trying to call the waiter because
he was so hungry he said. He ate the evidence, and the waiter didn't believe Bryan. My brother tried to say that there really was a shrimp and it was delicious, but the waiter wasn't buying it. After the meal, he brought us all fortune cookies, and my brother was given a chocolate one. It was the first time that any of us had seen chocolate fortune cookies. My brother opened his and it said, "Servitude is the gift we give to the world." He called the waiter over again and told him, "These are racist fortune cookies! First you tried to kill my friend (Bryan is also black), and then you insult me." The great part is we were all laughing so hard including the waiter that this was just a good New York City food time.