I will begin my preliminary thoughts about the senior prom by saying that I am
not going to mine. Luckily, I don’t feel any pressure to go, and it’s because it seems like a pressured event that I don’t want to go. The pressure to try to fit into an event that lasts all night and requires getting dressed up is there because I don’t really have a relationship with anyone or any group in my class that would make a long formal event seem like fun. On the other hand, going to Six Flags with class members has great appeal. In fact, I can’t wait to go. What’s the difference? Six Flags doesn’t require getting dressed up, there are no social expectations, and the rides provide great entertainment requiring no other behavior except to have fun. Does a prom require other behavior except to have fun? I think it does.
My older brother said that he was not going to his senior prom or senior dance as it was called. He went to a private school on a scholarship. A teacher he liked very much talked him into taking a girl who wanted to go very badly and with him. The teacher told him that everyone should have the experience of going to their senior dance and that it was a rite of passage. He didn’t agree, but he didn’t want to let his teacher down. (She is still a great friend of his and went to his college graduation last year.) The trouble began when the girl’s mother called Reed a few weeks before the dance and told him that her daughter was going to wear a purple dress and she hoped Reed would wear a shirt and tie that would go with it. My brother the basketball player couldn’t believe this. Then her family arranged to take him to a store to pick out a tie and shirt to go with her dress. They were incredibly ugly in his opinion, but he bought them. Then when the day came, Reed went to the girl’s house. The grandmother met him at the door and took him to the bathroom and told him to take a shower. He said he had already taken a shower. She told him to take another one. She had heard that he had had a game earlier that day. Later, the father took a thousand (that’s how many it seemed) photos of his daughter and Reed. The dance lasted all night with breakfast included the next morning. Even though my brother loves to dance, he said it was the longest night of his life. Not that the girl wasn’t nice, it was just too long a time to be mainly with one person. When in college two years later he started dating a girl from his high school class who was at the dance. They are still together and still laugh about the senior dance which they both thought would never end.
My situation is worse than my brother’s was. At least he knew all the kids in his class really well. I don’t know anyone in my class outside the school day. I have always left immediately after 3 to go to dance class and then to soccer. On weekends I played soccer all year long and still do. It’s not that I don’t like dances. I love music and I really like to dance but not with any one person yet especially hour after hour. At BalletTech, my middle school, we had great DJs, everyone could dance, and we danced in groups. At Cornell recently, I went to a Lupe Fiasco concert and had an amazing time. I just don’t want to put myself in any pressured social position. School, dance training, and soccer training have been pressure enough. Let the people go to the prom who want to go, but I’ll see everyone at Six Flags.
Q # 1 - Why do people ask if you're going to Prom with a serioous look on their face?
Q # 2 - Why don't schools just have a great band for seniors so that everyone would want to go? (For example if Lupe Fiasco were going to perform, I would be there.)
Q # 3 - Is not going to the prom worse for girls than it is for boys?
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